Game 5: James Monroe vs. Super Bowl V

Wait a minute -- is that the Baltimore Colts representing the American Football Conference? Yessiree. In this first official post-merger season, the Colts, Browns and Steelers slid over from the NFL to the new AFC, as the unified league was split into two conferences and six divisions. That allowed two incumbent NFL teams, the Colts and Cowboys, to play each other in Super Bowl V in Miami.

It was an exciting game, if you go by the final five seconds, when rookie Colts kicker Jim O'Brien nailed a 32-yard field goal to win it, 16-13. The Colts had trailed 10-6 at the half, so it was an admirable comeback. But the game had so many messed-up plays critics called it the "Blunder Bowl." There were 11 turnovers. Bubba Smith supposedly refused to wear his ring, because the game was such a disaster.

Against such a clunker, you'd think James Monroe would cruise easily to victory. Not so fast! Yes, he's James Monroe of the Monroe Doctrine, the famous "get off my cloud" warning to other nations. Not many people leave doctrines as legacies. But we hear the Doc was actually written by John Quincy Adams. (JQA was so upset that Monroe took the credit, he supposedly refused to wear his Monroe Doctrine ring.)

So who wins? Despite not really authoring his own Doctrine, Monroe is universally considered a Top 20 President. Against a Blunder Bowl? We have to go with Ro.

SCORE AFTER THIS MATCH-UP: Presidents 4, Super Bowls 1.

Go to next match.

Game 4: James Madison vs. Super Bowl IV

Yes, James Madison co-wrote the Federalist Papers. He was a Founding Father. You can't take that away from him. But in the big chair, as President, well, we've had better. Madison's trade policies were questionable. He was outplayed by Napoleon and by the British, who impressed American seamen, hijacked maritime cargoes, and, after a declaration of war in 1812, entered Washington and set fire to the White House and the Capitol. Way to go.

Super Bowl IV, played in January 1970, wasn't an all-time classic, but at least no national institutions were torched. The Minnesota Vikings, led by coach Bud Grant (at a time when "Lou Grant" was a popular Minneapolis-based TV character), were favored to win. But the scrappy K.C. Chiefs dominated from the start, winning 23-7. The Vikes didn't even score in the first half and had just 67 yards rushing. Chiefs WR Otis Taylor had a 46-yard TD catch, but the team's real star was the Chiefs' truly Ed Asner-like coach Hank Stram, who wore a microphone and rattled off hilarious sideline chatter like, "Just keep matriculating the ball down the field, boys."

Not a super-dee-duper Super Bowl, but this one scorches Madison for the victory.

SCORE AFTER THIS MATCH-UP: Presidents 3, Super Bowls 1.

Go to next match.

Game 3: Thomas Jefferson vs. Super Bowl III

Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence. The third President defined American values and encoded them in a government built to maintain individual liberty. It's a resilient and glorious system that has endured more than two centuries.

But he didn't guarantee a victory.

That's what Jets QB Broadway Joe Namath did when he led his AFL champions into Super Bowl III against the NFL's mighty Baltimore Colts. When the Jets did the impossible, dominating the Colts on both sides of the ball in a 16-7 win, it didn't just alter the balance of power in professional football. It ushered in a new era in sports. Jefferson himself said: "I hold it that a little rebellion now and then is a good thing, as necessary in the political world as storms in the physical." And now that Jeffersonian ideal was coming true on the gridiron. Sports Illustrated called it "The Age of Audacity," a time of upheaval when outspoken athletes like Namath, Muhammad Ali, Jim Brown and Bill Russell spoke out, and the Hendrix version of "All Along the Watchtower" was playing in the background. Thomas Jefferson gave us life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness; in Super Bowl III, Namath and his Jets took those freedoms to another level.

This is an epic President-vs.-Super Bowl match-up. Choosing a winner wasn't, you know, self-evident. In the end, it came down to who wanted it more. Sorry, Joe. We're going with TJ.

SCORE AFTER THIS MATCH: Presidents 3, Super Bowls 0.

Go to next match.

Game 2: John Adams vs. Super Bowl II

Super Bowl II wasn't even technically called a Super Bowl yet. The game barely deserved it. The Packers were favored by 14 points and won by 19 -- 33 to 14 -- over the AFL's Oakland Raiders. The Oakland defense, non-famously nicknamed "Eleven Angry Men," failed to stop Bart Starr and Co. They were more angry after the game. The big story was that Coach Lombardi might retire after it, seemingly with nothing left to prove. He did. At halftime, Packers guard Jerry Kramer announced to his teammates: "Let's play the last 30 minutes for the old man." He wasn't talking about John Adams.

Adams had plenty left to prove, as we learned from HBO. He essentially was the executive producer behind the American Revolution -- he pulled the strings that got Thomas Jefferson to write the Declaration of Independence, he engineered George Washington into the job as first President and, after working as Washington's VP, he got the job himself. And as a bonus, he was married to Abigail Adams. Adams beats the spread easily here.

SCORE AFTER THIS MATCH: Presidents 2, Super Bowls 0.

Go to next match.

Game 1: George Washington vs. Super Bowl I

Our debut match-up is a meeting of audacious new ideas. It pits the first Super Bowl -- Packers vs. Chiefs -- against the first U.S. President, George Washington. Each was unforgettable in its, or his, own way, blazing a trail for those that would come later.

Just the fact that the first AFL-NFL championship game happened in 1967 was incredible. It was the result of a long, fierce battle between the leagues, then months of negotiation. The Kansas City Chiefs came with talent and flair, but few expected them to challenge the NFL dynasty Green Bay Packers. The Chiefs did run with Vince Lombardi's Pack in the first half, but Green Bay pulled away in the second half with three unanswered TDs, including two short bursts into the end zone by RB Elijah Pitts and a sweet Max McGee grab of a Bart Starr pass. Adding injury to the insult, in the fourth quarter boastful Chiefs defensive back Fred "the Hammer" Williamson was knocked out cold when his head hit Packers RB Donny Anderson's knee -- eliciting smirks from Packers veterans on the sidelines.

The game was historic...but not much of a surprise.

George Washington took office in 1789 and defined the U.S. Presidency. During his eight years in office, he led the Army, delegated wisely, held our fragile new nation together, and proved to countries around the world that the American experiment would stand. The rest, as they say, is history homework.

Hey, you know what they say: you can't fight Washington. Score an easy one for the Presidents!

SCORE AFTER THIS MATCH: Presidents 1, Super Bowls 0.

Go to next match.